Pirate of Cell Block 7-G: Curse of Wolverine's Chest
File this one under “Was it worth it?”
Gilberto Sanchez, 49, was sentenced to ONE YEAR in federal prison today for illegally uploading a copy of “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” and sharing it online.
I’m sorry, I missed that. What kind of prison was it again, Michael Bolton?
Ah yeah, that one.
Well, we all know what happens to child molesters when they get sent to jail. I wonder what happens to convicted superhero movie pirates? Laughed at maybe? Mocked at every turn?
I mean, I guess it could be worse for this guy. He could have gotten caught pirating “Twilight” or something. Boy would his face be red.
‘Bunyan’ wants blood!
If you’re anything like me, you’ve been waiting with baited breath for someone to make a movie where a character from a tall tale goes on a killing spree and offs a bunch of attractive twentysomethings.
Well, wait no more my long-suffering brethren and sistren, because here comes “Bunyan.”
The story is simple: A gaggle of (not-so)juvenile delinquents head out into the woods where they come face-to-face with the legendary ax-wielding lumberjack. Well, more like face-to-kneecap. You know. Because he’s so tall.
Bunyan is kept in the shadows for the entirety of the trailer. Was this an attempt by the filmmakers to keep their baddie mysterious and maybe even build a little nervous anticipation? Or was it because he’s an awful CGI piece of crap?
I’ll take option B for a million dollars, Alex.
Check out the trailer… if you dare! MWAHAHAHA!
Source: Bad Movie Nite