Remember the good old days? Back when girls were girls and
men were men. (PS: We sure could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.)
Anyway,
one of the staples of said good days was the Scantron test. As a kid, this was
about as good as a test could get. You got multiple choices, you got to fill
in a bunch of circles, teachers got to put their feet up and let a machine do
the grading for them. Everybody won.
The
only downside to the Scantron test? That nagging feeling that after you’d
filled in three “C” answers in a row that the next one couldn’t possibly be “C.”
Sure enough, you’d read the question and think “The answer’s C!” But no. That
little voice in your head kept saying “What are the odds the teacher would put
four “C’s” in a row like that? Then you’d end up picking “A” because you hadn’t
used it in like 10 questions even though you were 90% it was a joke answer.
Yeah,
that’s basically what happened with my Razzie predictions. My gut told me to go
“Jack and Jill” across the board, but the sight of all those pictures of Sandler’s
ugly mug in a row seemed wrong. So I tacked on a British supermodel and Ken
Jeong and braced for impact.
Ladies and
gentlemen, we have impact. I mean, it wasn’t all bad. I still managed to go 5-7
with my pre-Razzie predictions. Not too shabby really.
Sander’s
poopfest, “Jack and Jill” made history and swept every single solitary category
at the 32nd Annual Golden Raspberry Awards, a celebration of the
worst Hollywood has to offer.
No
other film had ever done that. Touche, Mr. S.
Sandler
took home Worst Actor and Worst Actress trophies for his dual roles as the
titular brother and sister.
Katie Holmes
and Al Pacino each took home Worst Supporting… nods for their roles in the
film.
The
three thespians also shared the Worst Screen Couple award and the Worst Ensemble
Award, as well.
For a
complete list of winner, click here. I’ll give you a hint. “Jack and Jill” won
it. Whatever it was you were thinking about, “Jack and Jill” won it. Stupid
little voice. I knew I should have just went with “C.”
Source:
Razzies
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