Thursday, September 22, 2011

News: More 'Scarface,' Centipedes and really smart people... sigh
Say hello to my lil’ friend… again
                Hip hop community rejoice! The day you’ve waited for is finally here! A remake/reimagining of “Scarface” is in the works!
                That sound you’re hearing right now is a thousand hip hop moguls updating their resumes and threatening vicious beat downs if their agents don’t land the lead role.
                I’ve never really understood the love the second take on “Scarface,” the Al Pacino version, received. I mean, the movie is ok, but radically overrated. It’s too long, agonizingly slow and needlessly talky.
                It has his moments, like the killer finale, but most of the three hours that lead up to it are flatout boring.
                Not much has been finalized yet, as Universal is still interviewing writers, but considering the merchandizing cash cow Pacino’s version became, the studio would be dumb not to do this. Like John Connor said: “Easy money.”

The centipede’s back in town!
                I never watched “The Human Centipede.” I like gory movies, I like gross movies, but there are just some things I don’t need to see. It just so happens that seeing three human beings sharing a digestive track is one of those things.
                So when writer/director Tom Six announced his sequel would take the envelope that part one merely pushed and defecate on it, I knew I’d be skipping it as well.
                Recently, Six (who amazingly seems like an ok guy) sat down and spilled some beans on “The Human Centipede 2: Full Sequence.”
                Among the highlights: His plans for a “Human Centipede” trilogy (sweet Jesus).
                Six also commented on whether his reputation as a perverted gore monger (my words) had any effect on the production of part 2. Incredibly, it didn’t. Apparently lots of folks are into mouth to butt stuff.
The recession has clearly made us all nuts.
“Human Centipede 2: Full Sequence” slithers into theaters on Oct. 7.
Smart people are reading your mind!
                I’m not sure I can do this article any justice, but I’ll give it a shot: A bunch of smart people somewhere did something that I can never begin to understand.
                Hmm… not much there. Let me try again.
                Scientists showed some folks a bunch of movie trailers and then used crazily elaborate and expensive technology to recreate the images based off of the subjects’ brainwaves.
                Eggats. The article is interesting, but written for a more science-inclined crowd then myself.
                Plus, I shudder to think about the garbage flowing through my brain after spending the last 10 months watching almost nothing but terrible movies for this blog. Yuck. It’s got to be like a sewer up there now.
                Anywho, my advice to you is to skim the article and skip the big words. Mostly, check out the pictures. The human brain is a horrifying, despicable place. Tom Six would love it there!
                Bumblebee tuna.     

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